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Full Name:missi jess
Last Login:2/7/18
Join Date:1/17/15
Profile Views:14,838
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GREENFROGGY1Posted by GREENFROGGY1   3/17/18 at 8:10am
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   1/3/17 at 5:58am
With all the new technology regarding fertility... recently, a 70-year-old friend of mine was able to give birth.

When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, I went to visit.

"May I see the new baby?" I asked.

"Not yet," She said "I'll make coffee and we can visit for a while first."

Thirty minutes had passed, and I asked, "May I see the new baby now?"

"No, not yet,'" She said.

After another few minutes had elapsed, I asked again, "May I see the baby now?"

"No, not yet," replied my friend.

Growing very impatient, I asked, "Well, when can I see the baby?"

"WHEN HE CRIES!" she yelled at me.

"WHEN HE CRIES?" I demanded. "Why do I have to wait until he CRIES?"

"BECAUSE... I FORGOT WHERE I PUT HIM, O.K.?!!"

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/23/16 at 5:58am
"It's not the gift, it's the thought that counts. So, I THOUGHT of getting you a very nice and expensive gift!"

gubiciiPosted by gubicii   10/2/16 at 5:18pm
7C8Posted by 7C8   6/26/16 at 3:37am
Very nice Wallpaper I would like to be part of this site. 7 CB
gubiciiPosted by gubicii   5/6/16 at 5:00pm
RosasioPosted by Rosasio   5/5/16 at 1:04am
[center]
dreamies.de[/center]
from: james
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   4/21/16 at 6:38am


Of Airplanes & Women

1. Airplanes usually kill you quickly and a woman takes her time.

2. Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.

3. Airplanes don’t get mad if you do a “touch and go.”

4. Airplanes don’t object to a pre-flight inspection.

5. Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation.

6. Airplanes have strict weight and balance limitations.

7. Airplanes can be flown any time.

8. Airplanes don’t come with in-laws.

9. Airplanes don’t care about how many other airplanes you’ve flown before.

10. Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time.

11. Airplanes don’t mind if you look at other airplanes.

12. Airplanes don’t mind if you buy airplane magazines.

13. Airplanes don’t comment on your piloting skills.

14. Airplanes don’t whine unless something is really wrong.

15. Airplanes do expect to be tied down.

However, when airplanes go quiet, just like women, it’s usually not very good.



♥ Friendship is everything
AlanasofiePosted by Alanasofie   4/16/16 at 10:14pm
Ekreen14Posted by Ekreen14   4/14/16 at 2:12pm
Happy Thursday!















RosasioPosted by Rosasio   4/1/16 at 8:51pm

from: james
Ekreen14Posted by Ekreen14   3/7/16 at 2:34pm
Hello......








gubiciiPosted by gubicii   3/2/16 at 6:52pm
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   2/15/16 at 10:22am
Good day?











This is taken from my back yard, looking south.

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   2/13/16 at 5:45pm
Well, I lost another fan/friend this week;
"jimmyjohnz." Did you know him, too?




A red-haired woman goes to the Pharmacy in her neighborhood, and says to the pharmacist, "I'd like a poison that will kill my husband, but make it look like he died of natural causes."

The pharmacist says, "Ma'am, not only can I not do that for you, I'm going to call the police and report you."

As he grabs the phone, the woman takes out a piece of paper from her pocket and hands it to him. It's a picture of her husband having sex with the Pharmacist's wife.

"Oh," he says, "you should have told me you had a prescription."

https://youtu.be/J7MoWPTeYS4

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   2/11/16 at 11:32am


There was a lizard who was walking through the rainforest, he looked up in the tree and saw a koala smoking a cigar. So, the lizard goes up the tree and smokes a few cigars with the koala. After a while, the lizard decides to go down to the pond to get a drink for his dry mouth, so he scurries down the tree and over to the pond where there was a crocodile watching.

The crocodile says, "What are you doing drinking from my pond?"

"Well, I smoked a few cigars with this koala, and I have a really bad dry mouth," the lizard responded.

In shock, the crocodile says, "You don't say! I've never seen a cigar smoking koala. I have to see this!"

So the crocodile climbs out of the pond and walks over to the tree where the koala has smoked 4 or 5 more cigars since the lizard left.

The crocodile says, "Hey mate, what are you doing up there?"

The koala looks down in shock and says, "Bloody hell mate, how much water did you drink?"


PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   2/10/16 at 3:33pm


As a truck driver stops at a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door.

The trucker lowers the window, and she says, "Hi, my name is Heather and you're losing some of your load."

The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window.

As if they've never spoken, the blonde says brightly, "Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door. The trucker lowers the window.

Again she says "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!"

When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to the next light. When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde's car.

He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says, "Hi, my name is Devon! Okay?
It's winter-time in New York! Yes?
And I'm driving the SALT TRUCK!"



PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   2/6/16 at 1:58pm


IT'S THE WEEK-END MISSI!

WELCOME TO DESKTOP NEXUS!

Play safely, play hard, drink plenty of water, eat well, practice laughing, and relax before Sunday evening!
:)

luvtoluvPosted by luvtoluv   1/23/16 at 2:20am
Have a Nice day/Weekend!




Ekreen14Posted by Ekreen14   1/19/16 at 1:08pm











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