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Full Name:Roland Fourre
Birthday:April 24th, 1962
Last Login:12/12/14
Join Date:12/29/11
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PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   9 Hours Ago

Since he was a Chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky, he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, the Chief told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect firewood to be prepared..

But, being a practical leader, after several days, he got an idea, He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?"

"It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold," the meteorologist at the weather service responded.

So the chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared.

A week later, he called the National Weather Service again.

"Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?"

"Yes," the man at National Weather Service again replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."

The chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.

Two weeks later, the chief called the National Weather Service again.
"Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"

"Absolutely," the man replied. "It's looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters we've ever seen."

"How can you be so sure?" the chief asked.

The weatherman replied, "Because the Indians are collecting firewood like crazy!"
colby5678Posted by colby5678   13 Hours Ago

Wishing you joy and happiness for the holiday season! May the rest of your week be a good one!
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   Yesterday at 8:19am

A guy is 72 years old and he loves to fish.

As he was sitting in his boat the other day, he heard a voice say, "Pick me up."

He looked around and couldn't see anyone.

He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say again, "Pick me up."

He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog.

The man said, "Are you talking to me?"

The frog said, "Yes, I'm talking to you. Pick me up then, kiss me, and I'll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen. I'll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because I will be your bride!"

The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully and placed it in his front shirt pocket.

The frog said, "Hey, are you nuts? Didn't you hear what I said? I said kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride."

He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said, "Nah, at my age, I'd rather have a talking frog."


PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   Yesterday at 12:05am


A Lawyer walks into the bank to get a loan... and a bank employee assisted him with the requirements. The employee asked, "How much are you going to borrow, sir?"

"Five thousand dollars," the lawyer said.

"And when do you intend to repay it?" the bank employee asked.

"In 30 days."

"Okay, sir, we have a standard 18% annual interest on short-term loans. Is that agreeable to you?"

After a few moments of staring blankly at him, the lawyer nodded. The bank employee continued, "We would also need a guaranty, or collateral, for our first-time loaners."

The lawyer tossed him his car keys and pointed outside to a red Ferrari, "There's your collateral."

Dumbfounded, the bank employee said, "But sir, that collateral is worth way more than your loan amount."

Waving away the employee's protest, the lawyer said, "Yeah, it's worth 1.4 million dollars, but I'm fine with it. Now, can we sign the papers?"

After a few more minutes, the lawyer left the bank. The employee immediately recounted the odd incident to his co-employees, thinking, 'I can't believe there will ever come a day when we would meet such a simpleton lawyer.'

Still chuckling, the bank employee prepared a slip to put the Ferrari into temporary garage storage.

Thirty days later, the lawyer returned to the bank, paying the $5,000 and interest of $75. The employee handed over the car keys, but couldn't resist asking.

"Sir, why would you leave a million-dollar car for collateral for a loan of just five thousand dollars?"

"Simple," the lawyer replied, "I'm just on a business meeting here in the city, and the best priced parking garage costs $200 per month."

Then the lawyer left the bank employee speechless.


SheaCPosted by SheaC   12/15/14 at 5:51am

Hello, sweet friend.:) Good Morning/night !!!. Enjoy the beautiful new week .:) Hugs!!!

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/15/14 at 12:21am
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/14/14 at 10:23pm
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/14/14 at 9:26am

A young girl sits down on a park bench next to an old man. The girl pulls out a bag of chocolate bars and quickly eats one, and then starts eating on another.

The man sitting next to her looks over and says, "Eating that many chocolate bars is bad for you."

The girl responds, "My great grandfather lived to be 105-years old."

"And he ate that much chocolate?" asks the man.

"No," says the girl, "he was nice and minded his own business!"

SheaCPosted by SheaC   12/13/14 at 5:16am

Hello, lovely friend. :)Thank you soo much for adding me .:) Enjoy the day! Hugs
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/10/14 at 10:20pm

One day, while going to the Hardware Store, I passed by a retirement home.

On the front lawn were six old ladies, lying naked, on the grass.

I thought this was a bit unusual, but continued on my way.

On my return trip, I passed the same retirement home with the same six old ladies lying naked on the lawn. This time my curiosity got the better of me and I went
inside to talk to the retirement home Administrator, and asked her,
"Do you know there are six ladies lying naked on your front lawn?"

"Yes," she said, "aren't they just darlings? They're retired prostitutes and they're having a yard sale."

aussie48Posted by aussie48   12/9/14 at 2:44pm
thanks roland for the fan and of cause i will fan you back
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/8/14 at 7:16pm


Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.
The pharmacist at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"

"Eight," the boy replied.

The man continued, "Do you know what these are used for?"

The boy replied, "No. Not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's five."

"Oh, really?" the pharmacist replied with a grin.

"Yes," the boy said. "We saw on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim, play tennis, and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do none of those things, but with these..."

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/4/14 at 10:59pm

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I’ve been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice. However, I knew you would not approve of her because of her piercings, tattoos, and tight motorcycle clothes. Also, she is so much older than me.

But it’s not only the passion, Dad. She’s pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She deserves it!

Don’t worry, Dad. I’m 15, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday, I’m sure we’ll be back to visit, so you can get to know your many grandchildren.


P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I’m over at Jason’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that’s on the kitchen table. Call when it’s safe for me to come home!
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   12/3/14 at 4:51am

Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.

One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool... and stayed there.

Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Ralph out.

When the Head Nurse became aware of Edna's heroic act she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now has considered her to be mentally stable.

When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.
The bad news is, Ralph, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he's dead."

Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself. I put him there to dry.
How soon can I go home?"

Adelina_Posted by Adelina_   12/1/14 at 9:33am
Hello dear friend,

Have a great new week !
colby5678Posted by colby5678   11/30/14 at 3:01pm

“Beauty doesn't have to be about anything. What's a vase about? What's a sunset or a flower about? What, for that matter, is Mozart's Twenty-third Piano Concerto about?”
― Douglas Adams, The Salmon of Doubt
thanks for all your visits, wishing you a great week :)
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   11/30/14 at 7:33am

A dust covered cowboy walks into the Saloon and saw an Indian sitting at the far end of the bar, sipping on what looked to be a tall glass of milk.
The cowboy announces in a loud voice that he wishes to buy drinks for all in the saloon, except for the Indian.

As the bar fills with thirsty patrons, the Indian nods toward the cowboy and says, "Thanks!"

This seems to irritate the cowboy and orders another round for all in the saloon, then loudly adds, "And none for the Indian who drinks milk!"

At this point the Indian stands up and raises his glass of milk and says, "Thanks!"

The cowboy motions to the barkeep to come close, "What's the deal with the Indian? Every time I order drinks for everyone, he doesn't get mad when I exclude him from the beer or the whiskey! All he does is says, 'Thanks!' "

The barkeep, leans toward the cowboy, "He only drinks milk. He never drinks anything else, just the milk..."

The cowboy shouts, "DRINKS FOR EVERYONE IN THE BAR!"
and he pulls a $100-bill from his pocket, places it on the bar, and slides it toward the barkeep, who places it in the cash register, and closes the drawer.

The barkeep leans toward the cowboy, "You didn't let me finish..." he said. "The Indian never gets mad. He owns the Saloon!"

SkyPhoenixX1Posted by SkyPhoenixX1   11/29/14 at 9:37pm
HAPPY 1st ADVENT!!! 8)

Yep, the firebird is back in town, hah...!!! ;)

And a song from my music collection:
http://tinyurl.com/lujtsgn 8)

*Greets from Germany*

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   11/25/14 at 2:10pm


PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   11/25/14 at 3:52am
"What do you see on this card, sir?"
"It's a window, and there's an orgy going on inside!"
"All righty, then. What's on this one?"
"It's a porthole, and he's shivering her timbers!"
"OK, how about this one?"
"It's a keyhole, and boy are they getting it on!"
"Sir, I'm afraid you have a sexual perversion..."
"What? Me! You're the one with all the filthy pictures!"

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Happy Halloween, dear Roger !
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