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ADELINA39

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Full Name:	ADELINA ADELINA

Last Login:	3/29/15
Join Date:	1/14/15
Profile Views:	1,542

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Posted by Puppydawg 3/9/15 at 3:22am

A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb, and one foot in the gutter.

A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in pal. You're obviously drunk."

The wasted man asked, "Offisher, are you abwolutely shure I'm dwunk?"

"Yeah buddy, I'm sure," said the cop, "Let's go."

Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thank goodness. I thought I was cwippled."

"You think your walking's bad?" said the cop. "You should see how some people park, sober."

Yes, I know it's Monday, Adelina39, but try to have some kind of fun!

Posted by Puppydawg 3/7/15 at 1:50am

Wishing you a safe and happy week-end!
I'm longing for the colors of Spring!
Aren't you?

Posted by Puppydawg 3/2/15 at 4:03pm

Believe it or not... Spring is just around the corner!

Posted by Puppydawg 2/9/15 at 4:38am

Is this what a "DERP" looks like?

http://youtu.be/fdSVp9GFeS4

Be careful of your thoughts when you're alone, and
be more careful of your words when you're with
people!

Also, I'm a student of life and natural beauty... even though I'm deaf and almost blind.

Posted by castles 2/3/15 at 5:46pm

Posted by Puppydawg 1/26/15 at 9:31pm

None of his classmates liked him because of his stupidity, especially his teacher, who was always yelling at him, "You’re driving me mad Sam."

One day, Sam’s mother came to school to check on how he was doing. The teacher told his mom honestly, that her son was simply a disaster, getting very low marks, and never had she seen such a dumb boy in her entire teaching career.

The mother was shocked at the feedback and withdrew her son from school and moved out of Sydney, relocating to Newcastle.

25 years later, the teacher was diagnosed with an incurable cardio disease. All the doctors strongly advised her to have heart surgery, which only one surgeon could perform.

Left with no other options, the teacher decided to have the operation, which was successful. When she opened her eyes after the surgery she saw a handsome doctor smiling down at her.

She wanted to thank him, but could not talk. Her face started to turn blue, she raised her hand, trying to tell him something, but eventually died.

The doctor was shocked and was trying to work out what went wrong, when he turned around and saw our friend Sam, working as a cleaner in the clinic, who had unplugged the oxygen equipment in order to connect his vacuum cleaner!

Oh, you didn't think Sam became a heart surgeon, did you?

Posted by Puppydawg 1/26/15 at 4:29pm

Posted by Puppydawg 1/26/15 at 3:23pm

HAVE A HAPPY TUESDAY!

Posted by Puppydawg 1/26/15 at 12:09am

At a hotel restaurant, a man sitting alone, sees an attractive woman sitting alone at the next table.

Suddenly, she sneezes, and a glass eye comes flying out of her eye socket. It hurls by the man, and he snatches it from the air and hands it back to her.

"This is so embarrassing," the woman says, and she pops her eye back in place. "I'm so sorry to have disturbed you. Let me buy dinner to make it up to you. May I join you?" He nods.

The woman is a stimulating conversationalist, stunningly pretty, and the man finds they have a lot in common. He gets her phone number and says, "You are the most charming woman I've ever encountered. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?"

"No," she replies. "You just happened to catch my eye."

Have an adventurous week, Adelina!

Posted by Puppydawg 1/24/15 at 11:38pm

Have you heard this one?

A woman alone walks into a party, looking for a date, and see's a man standing by himself, near the corner of the room. She wanders over to him, extends her hand...

"Hello," she coos. "I'm Carmen."

"That's a pretty name," he says. "Is it a family name?"

"Oh, no," she answers. "It's a name I gave to myself; you see, I like cars and men & I came up with 'Carmen.' What's your name?"

"Uh... Beer'n'golf!"

Posted by Puppydawg 1/24/15 at 1:21am

Play safe (or relax) Saturday & Sunday!

Posted by Puppydawg 1/21/15 at 1:03am

http://youtu.be/O4QzHeUE-CM

Posted by Puppydawg 1/20/15 at 2:04pm

His 7-year old son has lost his first upper incisor this week. The boy woke-up to find a dollar under his pillow.

His wife was disturbed, "A whole dollar? What happened to giving out quarters?"

Last night, he lost his second front incisor. Again, the son found a dollar under his pillow.

His wife says, "Don't you think that's too much money to be giving for a tooth?"

"I don't know," the husband answers, "they looked like buck-teeth to me."

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