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Full Name:Ali
Birthday:May 19th, 1994
Last Login:8/7/15
Join Date:10/8/10
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Favorite Music:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNsEwOS5q4c

Dj Okawari
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Favorite Books:Death Note
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Favorite TV Shows:Elfen Lied
Asobi ni iku yo!
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PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   10/14/15 at 8:57pm

Stevie Wonder and Jack Nicklaus are in a bar. Nicklaus turns to Wonder and says, "How's the singing career going?"

Stevie Wonder says, "Not too bad, the latest album's gone into the top 10, so all in all I think it's pretty good. By the way, how's the golf?"

Nicklaus replies, "Not too bad. I m not winning as much as I used to, but I'm still making a bit of money. I had some problems with my swing, but I think I've got that worked out now."

"I always find that when my swing goes wrong I need to stop playing for a while and think about it, then the next time I play it seems to be all right," says Stevie.

"You play golf!?" asks Jack.

Stevie says, "Yes, I've been playing for years."

"But I... you're blind! How can you play golf if you are blind?" Jack asks.

"I get my caddie to stand in the middle of the fairway and call to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him, then when I get to where the ball lands the caddie moves to the green or further down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice," explains Stevie.

"But how do you putt?" Nicklaus wondered.

"Well," says Stevie, "I get my caddie to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball to the sound of his voice."

Nicklaus says, "What is your handicap?"

"I play off scratch," Stevie assures Jack.

Nicklaus is incredulous and says to Stevie, "We must play a game sometime."

Wonder replies, "Well, people don't take me seriously, so I only play for money, and I never play for less than $100,000 a hole."

Nicklaus thinks it over and says, "OK, I'm up for that. When would you like to play?"

"I don't care - any night next week is OK with me."

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   6/23/15 at 8:33am

A drunk is driving through the city on his motorcycle. He is weaving all over the road.

Eventually, a cop pulls him over.

"Did you know," says the cop, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell off of your cycle?"

"Oh, thank God," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."

SkyPhoenixX1Posted by SkyPhoenixX1   6/21/15 at 7:03pm

It's about time! The glorious summer season is back!

I wish you an amazing start into the Summer Season 2015 and a wonderful new week!

☆ Greets from Summerland Germany


PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   5/21/15 at 12:37am
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   4/24/15 at 10:00am

A professor is sent to the deepest jungles in Africa to live with a tribe of primitive peoples... He spends years with them, teaching them reading, writing, math, and science.

One day the wife of the tribe's chief gives birth to a white child. The tribe is shocked, and the chief pulls the professor aside and says, "Look here! You're the only white man we've ever seen and this woman gives birth to a white child. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened!"

The professor replied, "No, Chief. You're mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence, what we in the civilized world call an albino! Look at that field over there. All of the sheep are white except for one black one, correct? Nature does this on occasion."

The chief was silent for a moment, then said, "Tell you what," and he paused...

"You don't say anything more about that black sheep and I won't say anything more about that white child."

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/23/15 at 12:23am

Q: What do you call someone who speaks 3-languages?

A: Multilingual.


Q: What do you call a person who speaks 2-languages?

A: Bilingual.


Q: What do you call a person who speaks only 1-language?

A: An American! :D

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/16/15 at 6:55am
Children... Our future is in their hands!

Timmy was playing in the living room floor... When all of a sudden his mom comes from the kitchen and says, "Timmy, when your father comes home, please tell him to come to our bedroom immediately."

Although suspicious, he agrees.

Later, when his dad comes home, Timmy says, "Daddy! Daddy! Mom wants you to go to your room!"

The dad then goes upstairs to the master bedroom. Timmy is curious and quietly follows his father upstairs. When his father goes in, he locks the door. Timmy gets on his knees and looks through the keyhole and sees his mom standing naked in front of his dad.

She says, "John, I want a baby."

Timmy is shocked to realize that... after 9 months he has a baby sister in the house.

Timmy gives this some hard thinking, then goes to his mom and says, "Mommy! Mommy! When daddy comes home, tell him to go to my room, please?!"

She's surprised by his request, but says, "Yes" anyway.

Later, when his father comes home, his mom says, "John, Timmy wants you to go to his room."

John then goes to Timmy's room, where he sees his son standing naked. Timmy locks the door, looks his father dead in the eye, and says, "Daddy, I want a new bike."

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/6/15 at 3:09am

Jenny's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement, not even her parent's nasty divorce.

Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear and would be the best dressed mother of the bride ever!

A week later, Jenny was horrified to learn that her father's new young wife had bought the exact same dress as her mother!

Jenny asked her father's new young wife to exchange it, but she refused.

"Absolutely not, I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I'm wearing it," she replied.

Jenny told her mother who graciously said, "Never mind sweetheart. I'll get another dress. After all, it's your special day."

A few days later, they went shopping and did find another gorgeous dress.

When they stopped for lunch, Jenny asked her mother, "Aren't you going to return the other dress? You really don't have another occasion where you could wear it."

Her mother just smiled and replied, "Of course I do, dear. I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding."

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/6/15 at 12:29am
FED-EX knows how to make your deliveries personal.

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/5/15 at 3:42pm
Believe it or not, this was spotted flying in Europe, in December of last year. The picture was misplaced and just found today. You are one of a few to see it at DN.
Is this enough proof that Santa is real?

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/5/15 at 10:07am
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/5/15 at 9:57am
New idea for an old-country-style of gate.

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/4/15 at 1:38am

ElegiaPosted by Elegia   3/3/15 at 1:08pm
PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/3/15 at 12:38pm

The Lone Ranger and Tonto make camp at the end of the day, and set-up their tent. After they eat a pan of beans and sip whiskey... they go to their tent and both men fall sound asleep. Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, "Kemo Sabe, look toward sky, what you see?"

The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."

"What that tell you?" asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, "Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell YOU, Tonto?"

"You dumber than buffalo. Someone stole tent!"

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/3/15 at 10:38am

A man is hiking and he sees a farmer with two cows. One is black and the other is white. The man hiking walks up to the farmer and asks him, "What do you feed the cows?"

The farmer asks, "The black one, or the white one?"

"The black one," says the hiker.

"I feed it grass."

"What about the white one then?"

"I feed it grass too."

The man nods, "And where do they usually sleep?"

"The black one or the white one?" the farmer asks.

"The black one."

"In the barn," answers the farmer.

"What about the white one?" asks the hiker.

"It sleeps in the barn too," says the farmer.

The hiker starts getting frustrated, "And what do you use them for?" he asks.

The farmer asks again, "Which one?"

"The black one."

"Well, I normally use it to get milk."

"And the white one?"

"I use it to get milk too," says the farmer, scratching his arm.

The hiker is extremely angry and yells, "What the hell is wrong with you? You keep asking me which cow I mean, then give me the same response for both!"

The farmer answers calmly, "Well, because the black cow is mine."

"Oh, and what about the white cow?" asks the hiker.

"It's mine too.."

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/3/15 at 9:27am

A new model and Ad for a 2009 body-style of the Toyota Aygo:


Also, I love the tune playing in the background. I'd love to know the name of the tune and who made it; would you know who it is?

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/2/15 at 2:58pm
Believe it or not... Spring is just around the corner!

PuppydawgPosted by Puppydawg   3/2/15 at 12:33pm
That certain look you get when your brother lets-a-stinker in front of mixed company.

SkyPhoenixX1Posted by SkyPhoenixX1   2/20/15 at 12:30pm

21.06.2015 - That's the date, when the summer will return...

Four more months of waiting, so it's time for me to spread the first summer breeze here (just a little foretaste )...

Enjoy the weekend, may it be filled with a lot of sunshine and happiness!


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