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Oh yes. His GIRLFRIEND wants to know if I think he loves her. Well, I*ll gladly answer that!
HERE IT IS: It is EASY for a man to SAY he*s happy in his relationship, and when he*s married, even unhappily, that he*s happily married. WHY? It*s because of pride. Admitting he*s not happy in his relationship, or that he*s unhappily married, takes away the masculine pride about making the right decision in terms of being trapped (trapped HAPPILY) which is better than admitting both that you made the wrong decision and worse, you can*t get out so easily...(trapped UNHAPPILY). If you*re a man, which would you declare to the world?
Yeah...I know it*s all lies with the unhappily married men or men unhappy in some kind of committed relationship (living with the mother of your kids)...but neutral onlookers are not all about embarrassing these men who*ve made mistakes so we all keep quiet, right?
SPECIFICALLY, IN HER SITUATION: Okay, girl. He feels that he would want to have a deeper relationship with you. Afterall (afterall is a compound preposition no longer in use today except for those who insist), you are the mother of his children. To him, IF THERE WERE a REAL magic solution that would make everything alright, with you as a happy family, he would take that.
So what*s the problem? Although the structure of your relationship is such that you*re supposed to understand and accept him, including all of his ups and downs...it*s not happening at all. Day in and day out, you have decreed, maybe unconsciously yet naturally, that his role in life is to understand YOU, and never the other way around.
Now with men, THAT SORRY SITUATION IS NOT ENOUGH TO KILL THE HOPE THAT YOU WILL SOMEHOW DO THE SAME FOR THEM. Understand them, accept them, love them so much. Afterall, they chose you and don*t want to be proven wrong...So in your case, prove your man right in his choice of you. That*s all you*ve got to do.
So it*s not too late...He wants the two of you to be best friends, and he still believes in the vision of a happy family. You will marry each other but it shouldn*t stop there.
Does he love you now? There are many forms of love and you should win/earn all types of love from him. As a friend and sister, no problem. As a romantic partner, work on it. The possibilities are all there. (Well, truthfully, these past few years, it was all about YOU and your wants. Make up for that and everything will be alright.)
[Yeah I know..you were only asking me if I thought he loved you (you were sooo curious, right?)(The answer, by the way, in three words, is "yes and no".)...and you didn*t need the advice...but that advice is part of what I think he thinks about you.]
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