gubicii 9 years ago

[url=http://www.dreamies.de][img]http://img1.dreamies.de/img/191/b/tbl0xxhik02.gif[/img][/url]

gubicii 9 years ago

[url=http://www.dreamies.de][img]http://img25.dreamies.de/img/629/b/ai6idukqluz.gif[/img][/url]

gubicii 10 years ago

[URL=http://animals.desktopnexus.com/wallpaper/1014604/][IMG]http://cache.desktopnexus.com/thumbseg/1014/1014604-bigthumbnail.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

Puppydawg 10 years ago

[URL=http://animals.desktopnexus.com/wallpaper/300791/][IMG]http://cache.desktopnexus.com/thumbseg/300/300791-bigthumbnail.jpg[/IMG][/URL][color=black]

A farmer stopped by the local mechanic's shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home.

On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the store he now had a problem - how to carry his entire purchases home.

While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, "Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?"

The farmer said, "Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close to that house. I would walk you there, but I can't carry this lot."

The old lady suggested, "Why don't you put the can of paint in the bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?"

"Why thank you very much," he said, and proceeded to walk the old girl home.

On the way he says, "Let's take a short-cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time."

The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, "I'm a lonely widow without a husband to defend me.. how do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and have your way with me?"

The farmer said, "Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?"

The old lady replied, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens."[/color]

[URL=http://animals.desktopnexus.com/wallpaper/1173812/][IMG]http://cache.desktopnexus.com/thumbseg/1173/1173812-bigthumbnail.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

gubicii 10 years ago

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Puppydawg 10 years ago

[URL=http://cars.desktopnexus.com/wallpaper/1905190/][IMG]http://cache.desktopnexus.com/thumbseg/1905/1905190-bigthumbnail.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

[B][color=black][U]Black and White TV[/U]

(Under age 45? You won't understand)

You could hardly see for all the snow, spread those rabbit ears as far as they go.

"Good Night, David. Good Night, Chet."

My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs and spread mayo on the same cutting board with the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem to get food poisoning.

My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the counter and I used to eat it raw sometimes, too. Our school sandwiches were wrapped in wax paper in a brown paper bag, not in ice pack coolers, but I can't remember getting ecoli.

Almost all of us would have rather gone swimming in the lake, instead of a pristine pool (talk about boring), no beach closures then.

The term cell phone would have conjured up a phone in a jail cell, and a pager was the school PA system.

We all took gym, not PE... and risked permanent injury with a pair of high top Ked's (only worn in gym) instead of having cross-training athletic shoes with air cushion soles and built in light reflectors. I can't recall any injuries but they must have happened because they tell us how much safer we are now.

Flunking gym was not an option... Even for stupid kids! I guess PE must be much harder than gym.

Speaking of school, we all said prayers and sang the national anthem, and staying in detention after school caught all sorts of negative attention.

We must have had horribly damaged psyches. What an archaic health system we had then. Remember school nurses? Ours wore a hat and everything.

I thought that I was supposed to accomplish something before I was allowed to be proud of myself.

I just can't recall how bored we were without computers, Play Station, Nintendo, X-box or 270 digital TV cable stations.

Oh yeah... And where was the Benadryl and sterilization kit when I got that bee sting? I could have been killed!

We played 'king of the hill' on piles of gravel left on vacant construction sites, and when we got hurt, Mom pulled out the 48-cent bottle of Mercurochrome (kids liked it better because it didn't sting like iodine did) and then we got our butt spanked.

Now, it's a trip to the emergency room, followed by a 10-day dose of a $99 bottle of antibiotics, and then Mom calls the attorney to sue the contractor for leaving a horribly vicious pile of gravel where it was such a threat.

We didn't act up at the neighbor's house either; because if we did we got our butt spanked there and then we got our butt spanked again when we got home.

I recall Donny Rybolt from next door coming over and doing his tricks on the front stoop, just before he fell off.
Little did his Mom know that she could have owned our house.

Instead, she picked him up and swatted him for being such a jerk. Yes, it was a neighborhood run a muck.

To top it off, not a single person I knew had ever been told that they were from a dysfunctional family.

How could we possibly have known that?

We needed to get into group therapy and anger management classes.

We were obviously so duped by so many social ills, that we didn't even notice that the entire country wasn't taking Prozac!

How did we ever survive?

LOVE TO ALL OF US WHO SHARED THIS ERA; AND TO ALL WHO DIDN'T, SORRY FOR WHAT YOU MISSED. I WOULDN'T TRADE IT FOR ANYTHING!

[I]I remember that life's most simple pleasures were very often the best![/I]
[/color][color=green]
HAVE A GOOD DAY[/color] :)
[/B]

Eastern.Light 10 years ago

Happy New Year and Best Wishes.
Martin

Puppydawg 10 years ago

[URL=http://nature.desktopnexus.com/wallpaper/185060/][IMG]http://cache.desktopnexus.com/thumbseg/185/185060-bigthumbnail.jpg[/IMG][/URL]

[B][color=black]Two hunters are walking through the woods, come to a clearing, and see a deep, dark hole, and one hunter says to the other, "How deep is that thing?"

They both find a rusty anvil and throw it in. The anvil falls so far that the hunters don't hear it hit the bottom, but then they suddenly see a goat sprinting past them, and it jumps into the hole. They stand by the hole disbelieving what just happened, and a farmer comes rushing-up to them.

The farmer says, "Have you guys seen my goat, Becky?"

The hunters reply, "Yeah, it ran passed us and jumped into that hole."

The farmer says, [I]"That's impossible. She couldn't have done that. She was chained to a 125-pound anvil!"[/I]
[/color]
[/B]
[URL=http://animals.desktopnexus.com/wallpaper/1190006/][IMG]http://cache.desktopnexus.com/thumbseg/1190/1190006-bigthumbnail.jpg[/IMG][/URL][color=red][I]

Yes, cruelty & animals - this is my first joke of 2016.
!!! Happy New Year !!![/I][/color] :)

Eastern.Light 10 years ago

Happy New Year to You.

I will send You one postcard or two, these days
I promise, I know how is that staff going
but I'm hiding

Martin